And now for something completely different!

I am trying to start a photography business. This is mind numbingly scary at some points for me. Part of the time I'm like, "Yes! I can do this! It will be awesome and I'll work for myself!" and the other part of the time I'm hiding in the dark corners of my mind wondering what exactly I'm thinking. What if I mess up? What if a client doesn't like what I do? What if I accidentally piss them off because they don't understand sarcasm?!?! My friend put it this way, "You need this." she says. She's not wrong. I work for my dad, and I also have 3 uncles here, not to mention that most of the guys here have been around my entire life so they're extended family too. It's not bad, but it's not exactly my dream either. Sitting at a desk was never a dream of mine, but now I've been here 5 years and I know how to answer phones and sit at a desk. It's been so long since I've gotten behind a camera that I'm not sure I'll remember anything. It's outside my box, and everyone says to break out of that kind of thing, but I don't remember anyone saying that it can actually be really freaky! Any tips on how to break out of the norm?

Tattoo or no?

So I was playing around on Pinterest this morning when I ran across a photo of someone with a knitting tattoo. And promptly freaked out. I used to want a tattoo, but I could never think of anything I love enough to have permanently inked on my body. But I love knitting! This idea is great! I still don't know if I could sit through it, but I have finally figured out something I could stand having on my body! This is stupid exciting for me today, especially since work is slow, and I'm sitting here trying to decide how it should look and where it should go. You know, just in case I decide I have the balls one day to go get it done. It'll probably have a ball of yarn, some knitting needles, and some skulls somewhere. Awesome! I know. Anyways, here is my board if you're a fan of Pinterest. If you've never used it, you should totally get on that.

Kitty update!

Well my friend brought me the cat Saturday morning. She's been calling him and Peanut, and HE was supposed to be a SHE, but I can definitely see some fuzzy buttons. He is 6 months old, sweet and snuggly, all black with a white patch on his chest and belly. I heart him already.

Sebastian on the other hand wants to know what the hell is going on, and why is that THING getting on MY sofa.

It started out well. When we first introduced them I was holding kitty, and Matt was holding Sebastian. I put kitty on the floor, and picked him up and made a big deal about loving on him, then we switched places and I made Matt sit on the couch with kitty cause I knew he'd had problems with that before. Everything was great! So great that Sebastian got yummy peanut buttery doggie treats for being so awesome!

Later, Sebastian fell asleep in his chair with his head hanging off it and kitty came out from behind the couch and flicked the dog in the face with his tail. Sebastian woke up and just watched him and that was it. Sadly, that didn't last. Kitty jumped on Matt's lap at one point and the dog went after him, and last night I'm not even sure how it happened, but the cat must have looked at him wrong and he went off. Matt jumped when the barking started and accidentally dumped his cake on the floor, I took after Sebastian and told him NO and BAD BOY.

I felt soooo guilty too. We put Sebastian to bed and shut the door for awhile before we went to sleep too. Here's hoping this ends up working out!!

We are trying to think of names for kitty too. Right now, Felix is the most popular.

Craziness

For some odd reason I feel like this week has been busy and crazy and I'm exhausted because of it. The funny thing is, other than work, and 2 days of going to the gym, I don't think all that much has been going on! There were a few days this week where my brain was going nonstop and I was all, "KITTENS! BABIES! WORK! DRAMA! SQUIRREL!! Wait....where'd it go?" Maybe that's why I've felt so crazy this week. It was so bad on Wednesday that I ended up getting anxious, and to distract myself I started to read . (Why didn't I find her sooner! She's awesome!) By the end of the day I couldn't decide if I should laugh hysterically at everything, or if I was on the verge of a break down. It was pretty funny. Also on Saturday my friend is bringing me a 6 month old kitten. I can't decide if this is the most awesome thing ever, or the scariest thing ever right now. Cause here's the thing, my last cat, Chaucer, who I have mentioned before, drove my dog up a wall! Sebastian hated him. It was a month or so before Sebastian could bear the sight of him a few feet from me. Well now Chaucer lives with my parents and my mom just won't give him back. He's too happy, he's allowed outside, and he has more animals to fuck with! He's also discovered the computer, and that if he lays on the wireless keyboard he can send my parents shooting out of bed going, "What the hell is going on!?", because they left the speakers on. Loud. I heard that mom made the mistake of trying to take the keyboard away from Chaucer last week, which resulted in Chaucer chasing her and her screaming. Dad thought it was hysterical, and now mom has a big ol' kitty scratch on the back of her leg. But back to this new kitten... I will be so disappointed if Sebastian freaks out. So I've decided that I need to make this the most awesome introduction ever by making sure we have a ton of hot dogs. Last month some trainers came out to meet my dog and he ended up being the sweetest dog ever and even did tricks for them! He never does that with strangers. And it's because they had hot dogs, and smelled like hot dogs. While I was thinking about the fact that we need hot dogs to make him think that this kitten is the bestest thing ever, my brain totally side tracked and goes, "I should rub a hot dog on the kitten!" What the hell brain!? How's that going to help!? What if he thinks she smells so good he licks her till all her fur is gone!? Or worse! What if she smells so much like a hot dog he bites her!?!? Sebastian really is awesome, but after my break up last year he's gotten into this fear thing. And a territorial thing. If he doesn't know you, you probably shouldn't just randomly walk into the yard! So I found some awesome trainers that came to the house, and he immediately turned into "Awesome Puppy" because hot dogs are amazing. They kept wanting to get a rise out of him and asking, "If we do this, do you think he'll get upset?" because it's hard to train something you can't see, right? But I ended up answering pretty much every time, "Well no, because you gave him hot dogs and hot dogs trump fear and aggression." The training is going really well, but we haven't brought in a animal he doesn't know since. Wish us luck!

My cat...

Well I guess he's a kitten still really. About 8 months old. You can't cuddle him, you can barely pet him, and if he lays on you it's at your own risk.

I named him Chaucer. Like the author Geoffrey Chaucer. I saw him at Petsmart and he was handsome and he looked intelligent so I decided he must be a Chaucer. He was there for a month before I finally gave in. He was just so gorgeous looking, being mostly white with an orange tail and a few other orange spots, and he was a kitten still! Surely he would be adopted before I could give in. I already have a dog, my last cat had passed away a few months before...I so was not getting this kitten!! Then a month passed and he was still there, so I gave in. You see where this is headed, right?

I guess I should've tried picking him up before I made the final decision. Then I would've known why he hadn't been adopted yet. I pick him up to put him in his crate and he starts BITING ME. The nice lady that I dealt with promised that it was just because he had been cooped up for so long and needed to get out and play and SURELY when he settles into his happy new home, he'll be much calmer.

LIAR!!! But what do you do? I had paid and signed everything and she had gotten him a bright PINK collar that glared so nicely off his squirrel like white fur. I can't give it back now! To top it off, my dog hated him, and he hated me and drew blood often...

But now...the dog I'm pretty sure still hates him most of the time, and Chaucer still attacks everything that moves. My friends call him Geoff because he's dumb, but the freaky thing is...he's really not. He's REALLY smart, but about the strangest things. For instance, he knows every place that I may hide a hair tie. Even if he's only seen it in said place once. Like the travel bag I use for toiletries, my purses, the trash can from when I broke one, and the back of the toilet when I hop in the shower. And he methodically checks these places on a daily basis. He saw a bug in the fireplace ONCE well over a month ago, and spends an hour or more sitting in it looking into the corner every single night.

He has a cat door that goes to the basement and his litter box, right? I wake up this morning and there is something lying in front of it and I realize it's a blanket. A blanket I had left in the laundry room down there to wash.

I can't tell you how much I wish I could've seen him contemplating the blanket, then carrying it across the floor, and up a flight of stairs. That would've been funny enough for me.

But the fight to fit it all through the cat door would've been priceless.

More fudge!

So after making that last batch of fudge last week I found out that my dad and boyfriend don't like fudge because they think it is just too sweet. So I started wondering if I could alter the recipe some and make fudge they would eat. So instead of 3 cups of sugar and semi-sweet chocolate I used 2 cups of sugar and unsweetened chocolate. Annnnnnd...

It worked! It's a bit darker, still pretty rich, but really really good. A few friends of mine couldn't get enough of it tonight and that made me really happy. I'm going to take some to work and test it on them next. I put peppermint on half again cause my mom said she loved that part, but no pictures. It looks the same as before so I didn't really see a point. Yay for Christmas Fudge!

It's been awhile...

I swear I'm going to try to update this thing more. Seriously, I've been trying to decide what to update with. I've been home with a cold for a few days and today I was feeling so much better but cursed with cabin fever so I decided to make some fudge! But I wanted to make a little more Christmas-y so I added crushed peppermint to about half. I only tried a little bite and I think it's good, but I'll be taking it over to my boyfriends house to test the fudge on him and his mom and Grandma. hehe. So here's a few photos.

I officially want to jump into the tin and eat them all now. YUM!

And one silly photo to go on! Sebastian wondering why I'm in his face.